Shadow Work Series: How to Integrate the Shadow
Plus, the benefits of shadow work and how to continue your journey.
Hey y’all,
Hopefully last week’s newsletter on shadow archetypes helped give you some more insight on how various shadow patterns can arise and what to do about them.
As I’ve mentioned, a lot of people can confuse the shadow or your inner darkness as a thing you need to eliminate—and that couldn’t be further from the truth.
In fact, the more you try to run, the stronger it’ll come at you, because you would be perpetuating the same wounds that created it in the first place.
Remember, your shadow is comprised of the repressed parts of yourself, so denying or dismissing it will only add fuel to the fire. Does that mean you let it run wild? Also no. Unless you’re on a one-way train to destruction.
The goal is integration.
I’ve always looked at my shadow as my inner child, my inner teen and me in my early 20s (remember, the shadow has many faces). Frankly, they’re all pissed at me about something, and my job now is to reparent those wounds because she never had that type of support.
You may even notice yourself meeting people who remind you of yourself during those different stages, and you’ll show up for them in ways you wished someone would’ve shown up for you.
In those moments, I hope you know that you actually are showing up for that part of yourself by showing up for them. We’re all reflections of each other, after all.
A helpful tip I like to share with others (and one that I practice myself) is to keep a photo of yourself from when you were around 7 or 8 years old. I specifically say that age because that is usually when our first major trauma occurs, which coincides with the formation of our ego identity and our subconscious programming (which all come together to form our shadow).
When you’re going through a tough time and you feel like hurting yourself (whether that’s through addictions, abusive self-dialogue and habits, or enabling shadow behaviors), take a look at that photo.
That child’s well-being is your responsibility now. Would those behaviors help or hurt them? What would they need from you to feel safe and protected? Taken care of and loved?
So many people go through life losing their inner child. The real win in this experience is managing to keep your inner child with you throughout the journey.
With that said, let’s get into integrating the shadow…
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